Guide to Making the Bofa D's Top Fantasy Baseball Player List
Looks don't get Alfredo Griffen on the List.
The Bofa D's Top Fantasy Baseball Player List is a highly coveted spot by players throughout Major League Baseball. Athletes train for years in hopes that one day they will garner the recognition of Bofa D's. Sadly, for millions of young children around the world these dreams will never be realized. For no matter a person's athletic ability or hard work and effort, there is only one way to make it to the top...of the List. It comes down to what a man was born with. And by that, we mean their name. So here are the ways a player may make it to the List:
1. Your name can accomodate the addition of the combination of letters SCR to still sound like your name, but give the reader a sense of scrotum. See for example, Odalis becoming Scrodalis and Conine becoming Scronine.
2. With the addition of one or a few letters, your name can be turned into something sexual. See for example Wily Mo Pena, Adam Dunn, and Casey Kotchman.
3. With the addition or manipulation of a few letters, your name can be used to describe your playing abilities. See for example Latrine Hawkins who pitches like a urinal, Placenta Polanco who hits like an aborted fetus, and Jimmy H. Aynes who gives it to his team in the aynes any time he takes the mound.
4. This rule is achieved only by rarest of the rare. The true superstars. You may make the list if your name is just inherently funny and the members of Bofa D's simply enjoy saying it. See for example, Ricky Bones and on occasion Pujols (pronounced Poo-holes)
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